If I were a swearing woman

Grey's Anatomy. Sigh. It started in 2005 and then I watched 7 seasons in 3 weeks on laying in bed squirting liquid christmas dinner through my clenched teeth. Needless to say, I'm attached.

That's why I am FED UP! (Expletive) FED UP!!! (Expletive) pissed off. Not only has Shonda Rhimes single handedly  raised my blood pressure but she has manipulated me into fetal position cry sessions. I have forgiven and forgiven time and time again for her rash actions. Her writing is constantly the equivalent of offering a child a small cookie. Then, as a delightful surprise, Shonda lets the small child taste the cookie. Of course I-I mean- this said small and non adult child instantly grows attached to the warm, gooey and often pee-your-pants-hilarious center. She is drawn, addicted. This child swears that this cookie has now become a dear close friend. Suddenly, Shonda not only (expletive that rhymes with "itch") slaps the cookie out MY HAND AND MOUTH but then proceeds to tell me that the awesome funny Lexie is DEAD and there will be no more cookies EVER! (Expletive) YOU, COOKIE KILLER!

I have no idea why she feels the need to kill everyone and make everyone of these fictional character's lives a HELL HOLE but I have a feeling that she was the one in high school making a HUGE deal about everything... and still is. And I take personal offense to that.

I love you grey's anatomy, but I really don't have to like you right now. (Expletive).

A really good day

I just had the best day. I woke up feeling good and happy. My favorite radio station the morning zoo 97.1zht definitely always brightens the morning cause they are so hilArious. I was driving to work snacking of some banana bread I made the night before and my daily green smoothie. I had recently wanted to try to be all domestic after a book I had been reading about a woman in the 1800s pioneering, baking, raising children all that jazz. Dang straight! Practically laura fricking ingles. Okay so i purchased all items from a store but let's laura navigate her way through smiths in provo! Especially as a single girl. In the baking isle. It is no small feat, my friend. But it turned out so good! Anyways I had stayed up last night packaging Oreos in bags with notes that said "You're a star" for all my drama kids. Tht's right I said oreos. My domesticity only goes so far. I handed one to a shy little boy from my class that sadly missed our final performance. And said "We missed you! Here, this is for you!" and without hesitation he looked at me and said, "you're a really good teacher." I haven't ever really heard this boy say more that a sentence with 3 words in it. I just looked back and said "you're an awesome student!" so awesome.

Then as a lunch lady I have been so excited to serve sloppy joes so I could be Chris farly and sing the song! Well today was that day and all my fellow lunch ladies were feeling fine and sassy and served as my back up dancers and percussion. we had a jolly time quoting movies, talking I accents and passing the time during lunch while slapping a that juicy ground love on a bun.

Then math. Anyone who knows me knows I heatedly dislike math. Cept' 5th grade math. I rock 5th grade math. This math I can teach with confidence... Well all except the 9 times tables. But still, I'll take it. The kids and I race. I win everytime which is awesome (except the 9 times but im working on it 9x8=72) but they have fun t the back table with me. This is Especially apparent when one kid pissing me off and back talking just to get a rise while disrupting others after repeated empty threats-I mean warnings of being sent to the or more work or turn him in to the real teacher (I'm just he aide) I just responded with "*Tommy (*name changed), talk back one more time. I dare you and we'll see what happens." and another kid says to *Tommy, stop. Ms. Johnson is a nice teachee. She doesn't like being mean so just do your work.

Hot dang. Then more hours of awesome little thespians coming in with smiles as I stand at the door and act Like a dork and say "Welllcommme to class, we're happy to have you" in a British accent. They are practicing musical theater while I specifically work with them to show more facial expressions. luckily for my amusement the littlest group is adorable and also is doing bare necessities so they get to do really hilarious faces. Oh amazing.

Then wedding dress shopping with my wonderful roommate and a cranberry limeaid to top it off. Ending the night with an amazingly intense season finale of vampire diaries. I watched with my friend Ashley and our every thought was so in sync (BYE BYE BYE!). We would both scream WHAT?! Oooo following the same intonations and concluded with a grand finale of jumping up and down on my bed shouting OoOoooOOOHhh Mmuuhhhhyyyyyu GHGGoooooOoShshhHhhh!

Fun packed and awesome day. Simple but grand.